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I overcame living away from home



Joined: 5/31/2011
Posts: 1
efrizzy
Sitting on my new unfamiliar bed, attempting to take in the diminished room size, the dim and ongoing sounds of the air conditioning, I tried to picture my family van with my parents in the front seats and my three sisters and brother yelling at each other in the back. I knew they were leaving the same way we all came in, but they were missing one less person. Sitting on this new bed, on the 29th of August, I never felt so wrong in my own judgement. Was I able to last more than a day, a week without my family? After my family bustled in and out of the building together, carrying the bags I packed that touched the ceiling of our large van, it was time to say goodbye. Even though I was only an hour away, I couldn’t believe I was escorting my family out and not leaving with them. I felt deserted, stranded. This is how freshman feel, it’s normal. But I am 20 years old, a community college transfer student. I don’t get homesick. Watching them drive out of the parking lot, I contemplated the surprised reactions if I tried to run after their car flailing my hands in the air. I quickly dismissed that thought and proceeded to drag my heavy feet that felt like cinderblocks, even though I was wearing summer shorts and sandals, back to my apartment. It was only 2 o’clock in the afternoon and I was unsure what to do with the rest of my day. My life before this consisted of a full time job during the weekdays and strategically planned my classes. My life revolved around a strict schedule like this for over two years. I remember the day was beautiful, but I continued to drag my heavy feet into my cinderblock building, up the stairs to my dark apartment. I sat alone on my bed, wondering what I was doing there and what forced me out of my previous comfortable life. I finished packing and it took only an hour. I booted up my computer and left a message for my boyfriend, who was home, where I should have been. Time trickled away and I wondered when the other girls would arrive. I was nervous for them to come but I also needed some sort of action to occur so I wouldn’t fathom ideas of packing a bag, taking a bus to the closest train, and heading home. Here I was in a new town, at a new school, in a new apartment soon with three room mates I never met. Now, I didn’t have my home. I didn’t have the familiar classrooms of my old school. It was all different, but I would have to try. I had been planning this getaway since December. I always felt tinges of jealousy from my other friends who went away to colleges after senior year of high school. I remember feeling deserted in my own home, when that September after graduating in May, I watched all my friends pack up and leave to go to their new destinations for school. I was home and alone. So this was my chance now, to live away from my annoying parents and troublesome siblings. Not once did I reconsider another option, except now. My room mate then walked in, in the middle of my mind arguing with itself. After brief introductions with her and her family, she went outside to say goodbye to them. Okay, I thought, she seemed great. Throughout the rest of that day we continued to set up and decorate our new place. I realized she was a transfer student as well, attending another community college in New Jersey for two years. We went to the dining hall for dinner and even went out to a party that first night. I would have never known that day that she would soon become one of my really close friends. After I jumped out of my mind for one second, I soon was able to open up to everything my new school had to offer. I had to get over my longing for my old ways and my old life, because here I was, somewhere new and exciting and it wasn’t going to stop for me. I had to jump in!
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