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Marriage: Something 'More'

Joined: 12/6/2010
Posts: 5
Marriage: Do it for Love.
Growing up in the Bible belt I became sure of two things; one day I would be washed in the blood of Jesus and one day I would get married. However, at fifteen years old, my parent’s marriage disintegrated and I vowed I would never tie myself to another person. Marriage became a source of humor for me. I mocked women, who stretched their dollars and curled their hair for a special day, which I was sure would eventually end in agony or depression for one or both. I focused on being an independent woman, ignoring my faith and the smallest hope for love, because to me, no such thing existed.
I questioned my loved one’s marriages silently, doubting their authenticity. One day while skimming through an old bible, an item found in the corner of any establishment in the deep South, I came across a verse which mentioned orphans and widows and how we should specifically take care of them. I thought how odd that God would mention these two groups, children I could understand but, how should we care for a widow? Set her up on a blind date after three months of mourning?
As I have gotten older, I realize that the answer may be simpler than I thought. When you are a child and you lose your parents, you lose a significant piece of love. You lose the comfort, the continuity, the safety, but when you lose your lifelong lover, the one who makes breathing easier, you lose the daily passion and knowledge that someone craves you. If you’re lucky, yes I said lucky, you will hurt and ache from their absence, solidifying that they meant the world to you.
Loving someone who loves you without a second thought is why marriage is still a beacon of light in the world. As with anything, modern inventions, negative connotations and statistics blur the reality that is marriage. It isn’t a ceremony or a piece of paper and should never be an accomplishment. It’s a celebration, a celebration of love and a connection of comfort and passion; a crippling truth that selflessness and selfishness have somehow coincided.
I’ll admit that I am a prominent doubter, doubting my faith, myself and of course doubting Love. But, I know it’s real. I have seen a husband ache for his wife, to be near her and serve her and I have seen a young mother play the odds of life to bring a new being into the world. Terrifying almost to know that much love can exist; terrifying that that much power can exist. It’s not easy but it is powerful. I may get married one day; I may not. However, I know that my decision will not be based on the fact that I have seen too much marital failure but on the fact that marriage was designed for something more and that ‘more’ is the value of marriage and of course love.
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Comment by DarkStar49

Joined: 5/28/2009
Posts: 332
I really enjoyed reading your essay. I hope that your turning of feelings on marriage inspires others around you! I am understanding why so many people are down on the whole concept and reality of marriage, but I don't feel it is righteous and it sometimes saddens me that so many people are so against such a sacred and beautiful thing as marrying the one you truly love and who truly loves you! Whew....all in one breath! ;)
Good luck in this contest and in life and love.
Posted: Monday, March 21, 2011 6:27:53 AM
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Comment by Naomijo

Joined: 12/6/2010
Posts: 5
Thanks so much!
Posted: Wednesday, March 23, 2011 8:00:05 PM
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Comment by bugcandy

Joined: 11/5/2008
Posts: 286
I wanted to let you know that your essay for our February writing contest about marriage was one of the finalists. Megan, our PR Coordinator, will be in touch with you (if she hasn't already) via email.

We'll be announcing the winner later today or tomorrow. I personally look forward to seeing more of your essays/writing on

Thanks for sharing your point of view with us!


Presient & CEO,

P.s. Did you enter the current student writing contest?
Posted: Thursday, March 24, 2011 4:57:59 PM
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