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I overcame extreme depression

Joined: 5/31/2011
Posts: 1
When you are only 14, you should be out living, not wanting to be dead.

A month before my first day of High School, I was extremely excited. I was a cheerleader, I had a job and money, lots of friends, freedom, what else could I want? But in one week, I lost 50% of that.

First, one of my best friends moves to Thailand, and soon after that, I found out my boyfriend cheated on me with her. I was so broken and torn. Neither of them would talk to me and explain why, or what even happened. Then, I get laid off, losing my income and lots of my freedom. I tried to keep a budget, but by December, I had $16 left in my account.

At least I had my friends, I thought.

I didn't realize how much I shoved them away from me. I didn't see all the scars I was leaving on my skin. I spent days locked in my room, trying to forget all I had been struggling with. I loved my friends to much to burden them with myself. I probably wrote five or six different copies of suicide notes. I had made peace with all my friends, my family too. The plan was final in my mind. I wasn't going to see the next morning. I had a bottle of pills and my homecoming dress ready. But I had to make peace with one last person.

That night, at 9pm, I text-ed the one who had hurt me so badly. I text-ed my ex. I asked him to just tell me he really hated me and I had deserved all he'd put me through. I had that all straight in my mind. But he told me what I wasn't wanting to hear. He responded
You are the most amazing person I have ever met. I can not lie. I loved you, I love you. I hate myself for what I did to you. I wish I could fix it. You should hate me. I am the worst. I wish we could start over...

I spent hours crying. I realized that I wasn't helping anything with what I had been doing. I went to my mom for help.

Now, I am happy.
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