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I overcame my disappointment in myself.



Joined: 5/22/2011
Posts: 1
SuppiOkashi
This year, as a junior living in California, I chose to test my perseverance and strength with a regular class in addition to four advanced placement (AP) classes, many extra-curricular activities, and especially with track and field.
As a hard-working student, I wanted to do very well this year and for the first two trimesters I was able to survive with straight A’s. Then the spring arrived, meaning track and field was in season. Since freshman year I have been a member of the varsity track and field team, and this year I was determined to qualify for the California Interscholastic Federation (CIF) preliminaries. Our track season began immediately after President’s week, and from Monday to Friday I would have practice from usually from three o’clock until around five-thirty. I would arrive home at approximately six-fifteen and begin homework at seven or eight o’clock. I would sleep at ten-thirty, only to wake up at two-thirty in the morning to continue my work. Indeed, my amount of sleep each night was reduced to four hours. I would go to school each day tired, on the verge of falling asleep in a couple of my classes, and track would send me home even more fatigued and restless. Nevertheless, I persevered.
May approached quickly, meaning that not only were AP exams going to take place soon, but also Leagues. All of my AP classes were frantically trying to squeeze in the last bits of information and pile practice and review on top. My level of stress rose (as if it wasn’t high enough before), and it was no comfort to know that I was struggling in a couple of my AP classes. Additionally, I was feeling frustrated with myself in track and field because I believed I was doing poorly (though my coach begged to differ). Thus, as my level of stress increased, my level of confidence plummeted.
As the time came I fought my way through the AP exams, and my stress level recovered slightly afterwards. Fortunately in track, I succeeded to League finals and earned the opportunity to qualify for CIF preliminaries in triple jump. The event took place at Poway High, and I was given six jumps to achieve a mark (distance) that would be sufficient to qualify me. That day was not of the greatest as I was inconsistently hitting the board, thus causing my jumps to be scratched or otherwise measured shorter than their actual distances. It eventually narrowed down to the last jump, and I dedicated myself entirely to it. However, as luck would have it, I had scratched by an inch. Poof! My chances of advancing into CIF preliminaries disappeared. Feelings of inadequacy, incompetence, and defeat quickly surfaced; I was truly disappointed in myself.
I came to accept what had happened. I had to move on because I know that I must in order to become better. I may have stumbled here and there during the course of this year, but I will always continue walking.
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