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Marriage: To Each His or Her Own

Joined: 1/30/2011
Posts: 1
To be perfectly honest, I don’t know what my stance on marriage is.
I’m still a junior in high school. I’m too busy thinking about college and grades and S.A.T. scores and my social life and sleep to think about spending a future with someone I haven’t yet met. Someone that I’d have to spend my waking moments with, consult for every major purchase, and update every time I want to go somewhere. It sounds a lot like having another parent to me.
Although a marriage is more likely to succeed than it is to fail, the divorce rate is still relatively high and somewhat unsettling. The words “I do” may not seem to pose a risk at the time that they are uttered, but they actually automatically present the newly-weds with a 41% chance of divorce (provided they live in the United States). Do the potential benefits of a marriage outweigh the potential costs? If the promise “to have and behold from this day on” no matter the circumstance “until death do us part” is so easily broken, what is the difference between the value of a relationship and a marriage? Is there a value to a marriage? Do those words no longer hold any meaning? If they do, then how does one explain the atrocious divorce rate? If they don’t, then why are so many people willing to risk ending up with a broken heart? Personally, I’d much rather keep mine intact.
So maybe I’m exaggerating or being slightly pessimistic. I won’t deny that marriage is a seemingly nice concept. The idea of living the rest of my life with someone that I could always turn to and count on for unconditional positive regard (other than God) IS nice. At a young age, I was influenced by the Disney Princesses, Shrek, and later by books and movies to believe that I should find “the one” to fall in love with. This idea then forms my opinion that the perfect marriage should not only involve a relationship with the significant other, but should also be successful. As I have (hopefully) made clear in the previous paragraph, however, guaranteed marital success does not exist.
Nevertheless, after all that I’ve said and contemplated, I feel like there’s still much more to say. I’ve bashed the concept of marriage in my head, but I can’t imagine living in a house by myself for the next sixty-some years. The idea of being in love, speaking my mind, having the occasional banter, and having someone to share my time with captivates me and like an innumerable amount of people before me, I may decide that the benefits outweigh the risks and that I can trust the future. For nearly every failed or bitter marriage, I’ve seen a loving, caring one. In conclusion, I don’t yet know if I ever want to be married in the future, and I’m going to try not to tell people what to think. To each his or her own.
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