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Marriage: Do I Need It?

Joined: 2/15/2011
Posts: 7
Since I was a small child, I’ve always wondered what the heck I would do when I grew up and had the option to…dare I say it? Get married. The prospect scared me, and at age seven, I decided that marriage was not for me. Who would want to live with me forever, and more importantly, who would I want to put up with forever? I couldn’t picture myself stuck with one man forever and ever. That decided it. I was going to stay single my whole life, traveling the world and, of course, being rich. I didn’t need a man to hinder me and I most definitely did not need children that I’d have to spend all my money on.

However, I’ve been thinking recently, reconsidering marriage as an option for my adult life. I realize I’m only sixteen. I’m sure most adults would laugh at me for even thinking about marriage at this stage in my life. But I like to think that it’s never too early to start considering my future. In fact, it’s legal to marry at the age of sixteen with parental consent in most states. I could very well get married right now if my parents allowed me to. But I’ve never even dated before. I feel like I’ll be unprepared to marry ten years from now. In no circumstance will I be ready for marriage in my teenage years.

Marriage, to me, has always seemed like the rite of passage to a successfully boring adulthood. Once you get married, there’s no turning back. Congratulations, you are now a boring, hard-working adult. There’s nothing fun or crazy about your life except the occasional night out at a boring, fancy restaurant.

Yet there’s something undeniably appealing about having someone who will be there for me whenever I need it. I have never had a true “best” friend in my life, but many closer friends who come and go. To have a single special person who knows me as well as I know myself sounds rather comforting. I long for the security I hope marriage would provide in my adult life.

On the other hand, so many marriages end in divorce. I cannot stand the thought of promising to devote my entire life to a person, only to never speak to them again. How awful! Marriage means nothing when not taken as a binding agreement. It is meaningless and degrading to happily married couples. I hope that I will not disgrace the gift of marriage by breaking that life-long promise.

Considering my hopes and desires, I am now completely open to the idea of being married when I’m an adult or at least having a serious long-term relationship. Years from now I may look back on this essay, or perhaps recall my views on marriage from when I was seven. I may laugh and ridicule my immature, foolish self, but I hope by then, my deepest desires and questions about marriage will have been addressed.
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Comment by michness

Joined: 1/25/2011
Posts: 210
It's good to stay open to any and all possibilities in life. Otherwise, you run the risk of cutting off wonderful opportunities--like forever love! Although it seems farfetched, it is possible. (Or maybe I'm just a hopeless romantic.)

I love your writing style! I can't wait to read something else by you :)
Posted: Thursday, February 17, 2011 3:22:47 PM
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Comment by sullysolipsism

Joined: 11/3/2010
Posts: 206
Great essay! Well thought out.
Posted: Friday, February 18, 2011 2:59:56 AM
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