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Marriage: It's for sum.



Joined: 2/9/2011
Posts: 10
Delaney Kay
man + woman = happily ever after
man + man = happily ever after
woman + woman = happily ever after

If that's true (which I think it is) then...why would someone NEED to get married? Sure, those equations suggest a more-than-platonic relationship. Couldn't they be friendship though? Don't they just suggest mutual love? Friend love, pet love, family love, relationship love. Lots of love. That's what a person needs in life.

I love my work. I love my family and my friends and my kitten named Helga. And yes. I love my man-friend.

There have been times in my life (which is but a short 16 years) when I've thought to myself 'Married? Nope. Not happening. It's not for me. People who get married are crazy. Marriage is the number one cause of divorce. Marriage ruins a relationship' and then I have those sappy moments. I lay in bed and watch J. Lo movies. I watch her get swept off her feet by blonde doctors and that one other guy whose name I can never remember. Those are the moments when I allow myself to have this specific thought 'Maybe marriage is for me. Maybe it's what I want. Being able to have unconditional love, and being able to rely on this person'

It's hard to have so many conflicting thoughts.

This is how my thought process about marriage usually goes (and yes, in this EXACT order)

1.) I hate it. I don't want it.
2.) It could be nice. I'd like to be married
3.) Having a happy life isn't due to having a partner. It's about self-satisfaction, et cetera

and last, but not least

4.) Why do I need to choose now?

The last is the best out of the 4 choices. At least it is for me.

I'm 16 years old. I don't know where I'm going to college. I haven't even graduated high school. My mood, my style, my friends, my interests (love interests included!) change. It would be a lie to say I know exactly what I want in life.

Why focus on that NOW? I'm a believer in the whole "que sera, sera" thing. Whatever will be, will be.

I'm going to live my life and I'm going to be happy. I'm going to try and live my dream and work on things I like and spend my time with people who make me feel good.

One day, maybe I'll realize that I'm content and I don't need to be married for that to continue. Or maybe I'll figure out that being married is what's good for me.

Whatever it is, I'm not deciding now. I'm not even going to think about it now.

I'm going to go play a game of scrabble with my younger sister. THAT'S worth more my time.

The only advice I can give to you is: don't let preconceived notions about marriage or love get in the way. Make your own decision.

Go get 'em tiger.
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