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Identity: Question



Joined: 3/27/2014
Posts: 8
Brinette
“Who I am?” was a simple question yet it causes such a difficult answer. In my early, childhood life, I would have answered, “I’m a disappointment” whenever I was continually castigated by my parents for my carelessness in studying and working ethics. Indeed, many time I believed I won’t have a successful future. I wasn’t as talented as my friends who win scholarships and prizes, or athletic as my older brother and sister who championed in sports and fitness. I wasn’t cerebral like Einstein, or beautiful like Jolie, or artistic like da Vinci. I made mistakes and in numerous time, I failed.

“Who I am? ” was a simple question yet it causes such a difficult answer. As a pre-teenager, I would have answered, “I am nobody” for so many occasions. Twelve year old was when I left my Asian country to move to America and becoming a completely, invisible recluse in middle school. Because of my ineptness in understanding English, accompanied with a horrible accent, I wasn’t particularly successful in making many friends. Who would have noticed an introverted, shy girl that rather hid behind the back door in her house than championing in front of the crowd?

“Who I am?” was a simple question yet it causes such a difficult answer. As a teenager, I would have answer “I don’t really know”, but that is an unacceptable answer because society expect you to know your goals and steps of life. If you are stuck in hesitation, parents would try to enforce you to become something they want, like my parents want me to become an economist or a doctor.

But what if I’m not a doctor, or lawyer, or beautiful, or artistic, or intelligent, or athletic, or heroic, or perfect? Who am I, then? Well, I’m a tryer, an experimenter, a mistake-maker. I’m flawed and hopelessly fluctuating between different ideas. I’m a writer. I created a thousand selves and shades of myself - the good, the evil, the jealous, the greedy, the intelligent, the romantic. I am the unity of everything, as I am one. Human ought not be categorized neatly into shapes and personalities, to have a single identity, as society demanded you to be. If you are a woman, you are expected to be good at housework. If you read a lot, you must have been a nerd. If you’re good at playing video games, you must have been a loner and had no future. The greatest way to achieve your ideal identity is to ignore the restraints and cliques, of everyone’s else around you, and become everything. Experiment.
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