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I Am Scared Of People; Being Alone

Joined: 10/19/2013
Posts: 1
I went to three different high schools in my three years of high school, you know freshman, sophomore, & junior year? Bad grades throughout, always because I was caught up with my friends doing things I shouldn't, involved in petty female drama, relocated to a new state and knew someone at the high school already, got into fights, many detentions, ISS and so forth, now that i've gotten accepted into an magnet school i'm doing so much better, but i'm scared because I'm alone, I've never really been in isolation before, I am socially awkward in a way coming from someone who was always accompanied by a group of females, I was always scared of going up to people and sparking an conversation, was never involved in any groups always worked by myself, my new school is mainly populated of African Americans and Puerto Ricans, very few caucasians, so everyone is very loud, everyone is well acquainted with everyone, due to the population of 600 students, but to me it seems like it's 2000 or more, the school is very small, the hallways are tight people can barely get around, it's quite irritating. The teachers care alot about you and teach wonderfully, my grades have improved drastically coming from someone who was making straight F's not giving a care in the world. In the morning we are forced to sit in the cafeteria, I sit at an table with a group of girls I don't know, I believe they're freshmans, stuck up and always eyeballing me. I usually look at my phone the whole time, for some reason I feel like people are always looking at me. When classes are dismissed I am the first one out of class and into my next one, trying to avoid the crowded hallways and loud people. When it is lunchtime I go make conversation with the secretary in the guidance office or just hide in the bathroom, which I don't know if it's unheard of or not. People always say 'Oh join a club' or just talk to people, but how weird is it if someone walks up to your table and just starts talking to you? I also don't have time to join an club, because they don't provide transportation nor do my parents get off at the appropiate time to pick me up. So what do I do?
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