The "Don't - come - any - closer - 'cause - you - know - how - much - I - love -you" Blues

Finding happiness...Finding love...finding "the one"...this great quest is drummed into our collective heads from the time we are very young. The quest alone can kill you - or at least make you reevaluate your world on an almost daily basis. But, for purposes of today's diatribe, let's jump to the point where you've found the person you want to spend the rest of your life with.

Congratulations! Mazel Tov! Feliz...well, my Spanish is a bit rusty.

So now you're married - or together or whatever your situation and state allows and sanctions - and you're living with each other. If this were a video game, the credits would roll, the music would play and your thumbs would finally unclench...except, there's a much harder "bonus round" to this game - a secret level that... Read More

That Baby Smell

In honor of Mother’s Day approaching, I thought I’d share a quick story about something that happened to me recently.

A few weekends ago, my sister, her husband, and her new baby were in town from Texas, and came to my house to visit. My mom also came by, so there was a nice little group of us sitting around in my living room. Three generations of girls, all in the same room – it was pretty cool.

So although I am somewhat terrified of babies, and holding babies (for fear of breaking babies), I took the little baby from my mom, and cradled her in my lap. People, this is a cute baby. Some babies look like aliens. Some babies look like little old men. But this is the "baby bear" of babies, and is juuuust right.

Anyway, I'm holding the little gal, and I notice... Read More

Forever 21?

Last year on my B day I was still adjusting to Mj being out of the country and was feeling pretty angry about that. I figured my B day was going to suck anyways so I agreed to go to a 8 hour Microsoft Access Workshop even though it fell on the 1st. BIG mistake. It turns out it was not exactly the beginner class that it claimed to be and I sat there all day halfway falling asleep feeling stupid, confused, and worried that my job was going to be mad at me for wasting their money because I did not learn a thing. I thought Excel was bad...but Access is a whole new level of WHAT THE HECK. After the workshop I just went home and it was the worst B day ever. I told myself that next year was going to be different.

Despite that fact that I had no real plans I went ahead and took the da... Read More

Breaking Up Is Hard to Do

For some months now, I have put off telling my hairdresser that I will not be going back to her. I have been going to her for three years now, following her from one salon to another, but the last two haircuts have not been as good as previous ones. I feel bad because I know she's hurting for business and she does not charge outrageous fees. But I think it's time to move on.

She has been calling me and leaving messages because I'm too chicken to pick up the phone. Any advice on how to break up with your hairdresser? ... Read More

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My husband is being reactivated and delpoying to Afganistan in 45 days

Hi, My name is Shannon Kail, I am 25 years old. I live in Miami, Florida with my Husband who is 28 years old. we have been together for 5 years. We own a home out in the Everglades and we have 4 dogs. We met in the Army at a leadership school and it was love at first sight. He got out of the Army about 2 years ago and because of the troop surge in Afganistan my husband has been recalled to deploy. We found out yesterday he is leaving in 45 days. I cried so hard that I got a migraine and the saddest part was I saw my husband cry for the first time. Living without someone for a year is extremely hard. He was deployed our first year of marriage, but it made us closer because all we could do was communicate through letters and the phone. God I hope this is a sign that troops need his help, pl... Read More

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Creative Tips for Being Hot?

I'd like some CREATIVE tips on how to become more attractive, a.k.a. "hot," for my wife.

She thinks I'm the cat's meow as it is but I'd like to surprise her with some other things I could do that might push me into the Brad Pitt realm of "hotness."

We used to watch Grey's Anatomy and she'd say things like, "McSteamy's hot" and with drool dripping from her lips, barely utter in a cavewoman-like grunt, "McDreamy...hot...too."

So yeah...I guess I'd like to surprise her with a few little changes that might put me into the McBetterThanBefore hot.

I am open to suggestions on ways to increase my hotness factor.... Read More

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