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Only Sometimes

Joined: 11/16/2012
Posts: 2
Sometimes, as I'm walking through the packed halls of my tiny little school, I fear the worst. Instead of wondering who might walk up and give me a compliment, I wonder who might embarrass me or tear me down. I wonder who might call me ugly. I pray that you won't make that joke again. It hurts me more than you think.
Sometimes I just want to be alone. I just want you to get out of my room, shut my door, and let me play my music up loud. I want you to go somewhere so I can do what I like without any disturbances.
Sometimes, I hate myself. I hate the way I look, the way I act, the way I talk. I annoy even myself. I'm paranoid that everyone around me hates me. I worry that my friends are playing some sick joke on me. I think that they don't really want me at the places they invite me.
But only sometimes.
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Comment by RBrown201

Joined: 11/16/2012
Posts: 9
Dear EmmaCap,

Everyone feels this way at one point in their life. I mean, I went through this from 4th grade until last year, and now I have learned how to cope with it: to ignore what everyone else thinks, to think of yourself as majestic and amazing, wonderful, creative, beautiful, etc.
If you think the best, everyone else will too because of your radiating confidence.

Posted: Friday, November 16, 2012 10:11:09 PM
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Comment by Dana Kongo

Joined: 1/10/2013
Posts: 3
Hi Emma Cap;]

Reading this reminds me of what I've been going through in school since elementary. Bottom line is, you are not alone. I have felt the same way. Somedays, I am completely anti-social, because I fear that someone might call me out and embarass me. I would sometimes stay in my room crying myself to sleep. Self-esteem is still a major struggle for me. All I have to say to you, is stay strong. Most of the people who make fun of you only do it to make them feel better about themselves. You cannot take them seriously all the time, you will eventually have a mental breakdown one day. Nobody in this world is perfect. Even celebrities have things they don't like about themselves, that explains the nose and boob jobs they get. They have to worry about staying in shape, and so many other things. Just be you. That's how you gain respect from others, and even your own respect for yourself.

All the best,
Dana Kongo

Posted: Thursday, January 10, 2013 2:53:16 AM
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Comment by Dylan_Burnell

Joined: 1/9/2013
Posts: 51
I was a fat short kid in middle school and I was picked on constantly. The worst part of it is getting called fagot. Don't get me wrong i am not prejudice and I don't hate homosexuals or anything but it was the way they said it. But now that i am in high school I have shot up and bulked up a bit. Now people don't pick on me as much but even when they do it doesn't bother me anymore.

The moral of my story is that i am stronger now because of what happened than I would be if it didn't. Yes it was hard while it was going on but it will always get better.
Posted: Thursday, January 10, 2013 1:23:55 PM
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Comment by dreamer1095

Joined: 2/11/2013
Posts: 4
This was so beautifully written
It's exactly how I feel right now
Posted: Sunday, February 24, 2013 6:03:39 AM
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