Posted: Thursday, February 17, 2011 10:49:41 PM
When I think about marriage, the word “responsibility” comes to mind. Marriage is not something that is casual, and it takes a very committed relationship to make a marriage work. Marriage to me is a bonding of two individuals who have agreed to live together and create a home in which they learn about each other, help each other reach their goals and also have someone to hold for the rest of their lives.
There is value in marriage. Honoring the partnership means that the two have vowed to keep entire fidelity to one another, they will love and support each other, and will also accept differences and flaws. I don’t believe that marriage is overrated, because people first started marrying centuries ago and it’s not going to end anytime soon. It’s something that people decide to do when they’re ready, and several people do end up tying the knot.
Starting a family, the desire for love and long-term happiness are three good reasons for marriage. However, needs should be met by the couple, and the maturity level of both should be equal.
Personally, I want to get through college and work for a while before I consider settling down. I want to work hard so that my kids can have the same educational opportunities as I did, if not better. I have seen families that started young during their college years, but I do not wish to have to worry about living on the next paycheck to support a family or live with the in-laws.
A family that goes to the same church as me has been very successful. They have seven kids and have been through many experiences, you name it. The husband is my teacher at school, and I hear a new story every day. The marriage is working out well—they’ve been married for twelve years without any regrets, they respect each other and they are highly supportive. They have even adopted three of their kids from foster homes. This couple is showing responsibility. They claim that it is not always easy, but their relationship is stronger than ever.
The marriages I see that may need work are the ones with the partners not making compromises, committing adultery, violence and lack of trust. Marriages should be based on trust and caring, and if it fails, the family won’t survive. Divorce is a sad and difficult issue—it comes with heartbreak and a new set of problems to deal with.
I would not advise a couple living together before marriage. Under the assumption that these couples are sexually intimate, they would need to be tested for STDs and other diseases. Unwanted pregnancy can also occur. Although it is hard to know completely everything about a partner in either situation, healthy and safe dating can help make choosing a partner easier.
Finally, for couples who are financially ready, happy with their lives and are ready to take the next step, marriage can be possible.