When I cry-
my eyes turn green.
A light, light, green that
fades to cerulean. In
contrast, against my
contacts do not touch the blue
rims which never meet my line
When I cry, a lot, my eyes turn gold.
So bright- shining, against the red
contrasting background- that they burn
me. I hate- the gold, shimmering
vehicles- for they ruin,
My vision is all-
Blurred. And when I try to see past
the clouds, and the water there is-
nothing. The world, is empty. Simply
Burning. The gold, is on
Fire. It matches the gold in my hair
sweet- first, until you see the true
pain. Until you see the distance, I came,
only to be shut- off. Only to be turned down.
down, down and farther- down
back to before I saw there ever was a- down.
I saw the farthest place down that I never knew-
existed. It was, gold- rich, with gold. That ugly,
repulsive shade of- gold. The water overflowed.
If only I knew, why. If only there were answers and,
at least, one reason- why. Maybe I- could stop it.
Maybe the gold, that drags me under- drowning
me with that heavy weight that was once- a
dream. So beautiful- and light. And- white, like a
dove. I yearn for that time.
For now the hope-
shattered. Gold and red mix in shards-
trembling. My body- shakes against the current of
the waves. The moans that shake through my
bones and- veins. And- nerves, and- curves. And- life.
For now it has frozen- my life. And I still
do not, understand.
I reach out for the answer
that is not- here. For the sadness,
and the reason, that is never- clear
I grasp so desperately for something different.
But to fight with Fate, is to fight with
Fire. And fire- always- wins.
It burns, again,
licking the veins inside my eyeballs,
inside my nose- keeping me from
breathing- like normal. But what- is
normal? Not, this.
If this feeling is normal, then I want
no part of it. I will give up, the gold,
the riches that match the color of my
hair. Give up the light green that looks better
It is natural that I need- anyway. Natural,
is me together with my creation,
no one else- involved. No one else to,
judge. No one else to, steal her. Now-
the natural will not return. Now- I can take it
no more. Another wave is passing-
and the gold won't go, away.
writing blog: www.fabdelights.blogspot.com